Sign in Pub, seen and appreciated whilst on holiday...
joke of the day
Re: joke of the day
Sign in Pub, seen and appreciated whilst on holiday...
When you come to a fork in the road, take it
Re: joke of the day
Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day. The description was, 'Never shot. Dropped once’
When you come to a fork in the road, take it
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Piston Broke
- Site Admin
- Posts: 384
- Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 12:49 pm
joke of the day
Saw this Douglas Adams quote and thought of Bill
Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works. Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty- five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.
Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works. Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty- five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.
If it can't be fixed with duck tape it can't be fixed
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
Re: joke of the day
I also like Douglas Adams' definition of Technology: Comes with a set of instructions, like a bunch of flowers doesn't ....
When you come to a fork in the road, take it
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Renegadenemo
- Posts: 4588
- Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2008 12:29 pm
- Location: N E England
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Re: joke of the day
Not at all... it's just that once upon a time necessity was the mother of invention and now it's a case of invent something shiny then exploit the herd mentality having said we all need one. The extravagantly useless iPad, for example...Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.
I'm only a plumber from Cannock...
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
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Piston Broke
- Site Admin
- Posts: 384
- Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 12:49 pm
Re: joke of the day
People don't know what they want until you show it to themRenegadenemo wrote:Not at all... it's just that once upon a time necessity was the mother of invention and now it's a case of invent something shiny then exploit the herd mentality having said we all need one. The extravagantly useless iPad, for example...Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.
- Steve Jobs
If it can't be fixed with duck tape it can't be fixed
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
-
Renegadenemo
- Posts: 4588
- Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2008 12:29 pm
- Location: N E England
- Contact:
Re: joke of the day
Can't deny the man's utter genius - he certainly knew a herd of sheep when he saw one!People don't know what they want until you show it to them
I'm only a plumber from Cannock...
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
Re: joke of the day
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'I am not what is called a "civilized man", Professor. I have done with society for reasons that seem good to me.'
-
Renegadenemo
- Posts: 4588
- Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2008 12:29 pm
- Location: N E England
- Contact:
Re: joke of the day
I'm only a plumber from Cannock...
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
"As to reward, my profession is its own reward;" Sherlock Holmes.
I have wrought my simple plan
If I give one hour of joy
To the boy who’s half a man,
Or the man who’s half a boy.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
-
Piston Broke
- Site Admin
- Posts: 384
- Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 12:49 pm
Re: joke of the day
While stitching a cut on the hand of a 75 year
old farmer from Norfolk, whose hand was caught in the squeeze gate while
working cattle, the Doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to David Cameron,
Ed Milliband & Politicians in general and their role as our leaders.
The old farmer said, "Well, as I see it, most
Politicians are Post Turtles'.
'Not being familiar with the term, the Doctor asked
him what a 'post turtle' was.
The old farmer said, "When you're driving down a
country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top,
that's a post turtle."
The old farmer saw the puzzled look on the Doctor's
face so he continued to explain. "You know he didn't get up there by himself,
he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up
there, he's elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what
kind of dumb arse put him up there to begin with."
Best explanation of a politician I've ever heard !!!
old farmer from Norfolk, whose hand was caught in the squeeze gate while
working cattle, the Doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to David Cameron,
Ed Milliband & Politicians in general and their role as our leaders.
The old farmer said, "Well, as I see it, most
Politicians are Post Turtles'.
'Not being familiar with the term, the Doctor asked
him what a 'post turtle' was.
The old farmer said, "When you're driving down a
country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top,
that's a post turtle."
The old farmer saw the puzzled look on the Doctor's
face so he continued to explain. "You know he didn't get up there by himself,
he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up
there, he's elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what
kind of dumb arse put him up there to begin with."
Best explanation of a politician I've ever heard !!!
If it can't be fixed with duck tape it can't be fixed
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex