What you call a bear with no paw?-Rupert the bastard!
Took me a while to work that one out and I'm half sweaty! Paw, as in Pa, as in Father... Yes?
Scottish jokes are even more unfathomable than Geordie jokes!
joke of the day
Re: joke of the day
by Renegadenemo » Tue Oct 12, 2010 1:01 am
Took me a while to work that one out and I'm half sweaty! Paw, as in Pa, as in Father... Yes?
Scottish jokes are even more unfathomable than Geordie jokes!
I'm only a plumber from Cannock...
This is not put on as a public entertainment... it's put on to reach a certain goal.
This is not put on as a public entertainment... it's put on to reach a certain goal.
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Re: joke of the day
by Jordangbr » Tue Oct 12, 2010 1:37 am
Two Nun's are riding bikes down a cobbled street.
One say's to the other 'I haven't come this way before'
The other says 'It's probably the cobbles'.
One say's to the other 'I haven't come this way before'
The other says 'It's probably the cobbles'.
Bangers!
You must have known I was coming!
You must have known I was coming!
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Re: joke of the day
by bluebirdsback » Tue Oct 12, 2010 10:16 pm
Hers one for you then Bill
Whats the difference between a scotchman and Walt Disney
A scotchman likes whiskey but Walt Disney.
Or
What does an epileptic scotchman have for christmas.
A wi fit
Whats the difference between a scotchman and Walt Disney
A scotchman likes whiskey but Walt Disney.
Or
What does an epileptic scotchman have for christmas.
A wi fit
The moment you make something idiot proof a new breed of idiots will come along and prove you wrong
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bluebirdsback - Posts: 406
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Re: joke of the day
by Mike Bull » Wed Oct 13, 2010 8:44 am
What's the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex boy?
An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.
An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.
"You never had the things you thought you should have had,
and you'll not get them now..."
is mos redintegro
and you'll not get them now..."
is mos redintegro
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Mike Bull - Posts: 2945
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Re: joke of the day
by Piston Broke » Wed Oct 13, 2010 9:07 am
Man goes to the doctors
Man: Doctor some days I feel like Mickey Mouse and some days I feel like Donald Duck
Doctor: So how long have you been having these Disney spells
Man: Doctor some days I feel like Mickey Mouse and some days I feel like Donald Duck
Doctor: So how long have you been having these Disney spells
If it can't be fixed with duck tape it can't be fixed
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness"
Facebook is to socialising is what masturbation is to sex
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Re: joke of the day
by rob565uk » Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:26 pm
What do Wigan girls use for protection when having sex?
The nearest bus shelter ...
The nearest bus shelter ...
Once you have started something there is no going back in Life.....
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Re: joke of the day
by rob565uk » Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:30 pm
If an epileptic has a fit when in the bath, what is the best course of action?
Add the correct measure of detergent and then throw the washing in ..
Add the correct measure of detergent and then throw the washing in ..
Once you have started something there is no going back in Life.....
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Re: joke of the day
by ace_chris » Wed Oct 13, 2010 5:09 pm
Went to a quiz night at my local in Gateshead the other night
First question "What the f**k you looking at?"
First question "What the f**k you looking at?"
- ace_chris
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Re: joke of the day
by klingon » Wed Oct 13, 2010 9:20 pm
" scotchman"----- ITS BLOODY SCOTSMAN!- I don't mind the jokes-Englandish have been making them for years,but at least,please get my nationality right!-Scotch is a drink-A Scotsman is who you fight with once you've had one! 
"I hate two faced people-don't know which face to punch first!"
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Re: joke of the day
by bluebirdsback » Wed Oct 13, 2010 10:07 pm
What if the Scotsman is full of scotch?
The moment you make something idiot proof a new breed of idiots will come along and prove you wrong
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